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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/26497531">So. Hanahaki, huh?</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/lnrizkl/pseuds/lnrizkl'>lnrizkl</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Haikyuu!!</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Fluff and Angst, Hanahaki Disease, Hurt/Comfort, M/M</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-09-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-09-16</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-06 12:23:06</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,468</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/26497531</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/lnrizkl/pseuds/lnrizkl</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>When Atsumu was just a dumb teen with his twin when Osamu coughed up dozens of flowers during the night on his first year of highschool. He remembers him crying out, screaming out for their mother and for help while Atsumu only watched flowers fall from his mouth, horrified from it.</p><p>So he stopped thinking about love.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>162</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>So. Hanahaki, huh?</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>uhh yeah this is a mess but please comment because akdhf i love reading comments and it makes me think my stuff isn't just plainly ignored!</p><p>major tws for death mentions as well as disease (i mean, it's hanahaki-)</p><p>also i never wrote hanahaki so spare me.</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>When Atsumu was just a dumb teen with his twin when Osamu coughed up dozens of flowers during the night in his first year of high school. He remembers him crying out, screaming out for their mother for help while Atsumu only watched flowers fall from his mouth, horrified from it.</p><p>So he stopped thinking about love.<br/>He flirted, he had flings, but nothing else. He didn't want to get attached to anyone but his brother, walking away before anything even got to happen, hiding and not looking back.</p><p>He lived by that rule for years, tension building up as Osamu got successful with love and got rid of the disease once for all.</p><p>It was just another day in practice, shooting compliments at the hitters as they perfectly spiked his sets, smiling proudly and filling his ego when they complimented his hands.<br/>Hinata and Bokuto were particularly good. smiling and clapping at each other, hyping the whole team and making the mood somewhat stable, Atsumu being uninterested in it and instead of trying to take Sakusa's attention all for himself, laughing and following him through the court.</p><p>“Cmon Omi-Omi!” He repeats himself over and over, trying hard to gain even a small response from the outside hitter. almost whining the nickname out. “No fair, I know ya like me.”</p><p>“You wish.” The simple reply was enough to satisfy the setter.</p><p>“Not even a bit? Omiii so rude!” Atsumu chuckled, giving him a slight smack on the back and making him flinch. “Y'know ya can hit something else if y'know what I mean.”</p><p>It was Sakusa's time to chuckle, a tiny smile appearing on his face and dimples showing on his cheeks in the process. “Yeah sure. Will think about your offer. But at least don't dye your hair the color of piss again.”</p><p>Atsumu got filled with pride once again, puffing his chest out as an act of childishness and making Sakusa roll his eyes, open his mouth and freeze when the setter felt a sharp pain in his chest and a dry cough filled the air.<br/>The loud sound calls everyone's attention and instantly the team is worried at the repeated coughs that leave the fake blonde's body, falling to the floor and observing as Sakusa gets scared and moves away, running off to the locker room without even looking back.</p><p>Delicate white petals covered in blood fall from his mouth between coughs. He feels dizzy, lacking oxygen and thinking he is going to pass out when the fit stops and he lays there, focusing on the ceiling above him and trying to ignore his teammates' heads and questions, closing his eyes and sighing. </p><p>Deep down, he was terrified. Atsumu knew what it meant as he had seen his brother go through it. Hanahaki disease, cough up flowers growing in your lungs the moment you fall in love.<br/>They usually disappear if the love is mutual, but in case it's not, it's mortal and kills the host. Flowers being parasites to his lungs and pain flowing through his body as the realization hit him.</p><p>He was in love with Sakusa Kiyoomi. MSBY Black Jackals' Outside Hitter. Known for his moles, prickly personality, being a clean freak, and doing gross things with his wrists.<br/>Wrists he adored, wrists he loved seeing in motion when spiking the ball or simply receiving the ball.</p><p>Atsumu is out early from practice, dragging himself to his apartment and plopping down on the couch, taking his phone out and calling his brother.<br/>He doesn't know how much time went by, but the next thing he knew was that he somehow fell asleep talking to his twin and it was late enough to have a quick dinner and try to sleep for the night.<br/>Yet his body pleaded the opposite. His body pleaded to talk to Sakusa, to ask him if he was alright after seeing him run out of the gym disgusted by the petals on the floor.<br/>Soon enough he finds himself in the bathroom, coughing flowers and blood into the toilet and trying to push the thoughts of the boy from his head.</p><p> </p><p>Weeks pass peacefully, days blending and soon everyone forgets about the incident. Everything seems to be back to normal and everyone is giving them all once again.</p><p>Everything forgotten reminds Atsumu that it's a perfect time. The plan to make Sakusa fall in love with him.</p><p>Step one; be more generous with him.<br/>Give him more space even if his routine is set in annoying him. Giving him more sets and congratulating him more often and honestly.<br/>This makes Sakusa tolerate Atsumu slightly more, soft smiles still appearing and not ones that happened after the setter fails in something.</p><p>“What do you want, Miya?” Sakusa finally asks at once, making Atsumu stop in his tracks and look at the hitter as if he got caught doing something illegal, his chest having a faint feeling of being tugged. “You're so weird sometimes. Why are you acting like this now?”</p><p>“Well, Omi, I knew ya ran away the moment I coughed up flowers.” Atsumu tried to save the situation, closing his eyes and nervously grinning. “Wanted to make up for it. Yer scared of it, aren't you?”</p><p>Sakusa huffs as a response and calls the coach asking for something before nodding and dragging Atsumu towards the locker room, closing the door behind them.</p><p>“Who is it.”</p><p>“What?” Atsumu gets confused easily, but he perfectly understands the current question. and he dislikes it. The bluntness in the raven’s voice is bitter and feels tight on his chest as it echoes in his mind.</p><p>“Is it Kita?” Sakusa puts a hand on his forehead and sighs. “Your captain. Ex-Captain, I mean. It's all you talked about during Training Camp sometimes, really.”</p><p>Ah. He has no clue.<br/>He had to admit, Kita was one of the best people in the world, someone he admired and loved and dated. Yet somehow, it didn't work and they broke up, the white-haired boy getting Hanahaki a few weeks later and surviving as the love became mutual.</p><p>“No. Not at all, Omi.” Atsumu laughs, resting against one of the lockers. “That all you wanted to say? Because if so, gonna hafta ask you a question, too.”</p><p>Kiyoomi raises an eyebrow and looks over to the setter. Now Atsumu realizes how he is sitting on the bench, on a corner, and being the smallest person as he can be, tucking his hands between his thighs and making the setter cough a single petal followed by a curse. This time, the petal is colored purple and he simply brushes it off, hiding it under his feet after making sure Sakusa didn't see it.</p><p>“Do you have Hanahaki? Do ya like someone, Omi?” He purrs the name out, trying to get some sort of reaction from the other male.</p><p>Silence feels the room, the distant squeaks of shoes hitting the floor of the gym in practice, and the sounds the ball makes when hitting the floor or someone.<br/>The sound is familiar, both of them easing at the noises and making them sigh at the same time.</p><p>“Yes. I have it,” Sakusa answers after a while, making the setter fear the worse, “used to, at least.”</p><p>Wait.</p><p>Used to?</p><p>“I got the surgery to remove them. “The hitter answers as if he read his mind, a faint memory of Sakusa groaning and running to a bathroom leaving behind a single long red petal in his trace. “It's for the best.”</p><p>“You'll never fall in love then.”</p><p>Sakusa nods, understanding, and aware.</p><p>Both decide to leave it there for the day and Atsumu ignores the pain in his chest for the rest of the practice.</p><p> </p><p>Three days pass after the talk with Sakusa and Atsumu is ready to go on step two of his plan.</p><p>Step two; flirt with him for real.</p><p>“Yer actually really nice looking for a hitter, Omi-Omi!”</p><p>Sakusa cringes and looks away, ignoring him completely.</p><p>“Don't say,” Atsumu grins, putting a hand on Sakusa's shoulder, “ya want a piece of me too, eh? Jeez! Didn't expect to have an admirer in my own team.”</p><p>The raven facepalms himself as he takes off his mask, getting ready for a practice match.</p><p>“Maybe.” Sakusa's answer is cold and it makes a shiver run down Atsumu's spine. “How did you know?”</p><p>He got up from the bench and opened the door of the locker room, waiting for the setter.</p><p>“Are you coming or going to cough up even more flowers?”</p><p>Atsumu nods eagerly and runs out the door with Sakusa, getting yelled at for not wearing shorts and missing a shoe.</p><p>Ok, that was a failure so he drowns the petals and screams into the pillow of his apartment and calls his twin at unholy hours in the morning to rant about it.</p><p>Osamu listens and tries to help. His husband, Suna, is heard behind him kissing the neck of the silver-haired boy and grinding on him.</p><p>Atsumu hangs up the moment he hears his brother moan.</p><p>He doesn't sleep during the night, instead of staring at a corner trying to take out the memory of his twin getting fucked off and away from his mind. It haunts him.</p><p> </p><p>Step three is late, he spends days and nights coughing up the petals and calling in sick.</p><p>Luckily, Atsumu isn't as dumb as he seems and realizes that the petals are blue this time.<br/>So, he searches. What the fuck is the flower he's coughing up? He is so into his Google search that he gets scared when Bokuto and Hinata appear in front of him, wide smiles on their faces and hugging the setter.</p><p>“We were worried about you Atsumu!” Bokuto yells, overexcited about nothing. “We thought you died!”</p><p>“No, not yet sadly. God said to make me suffer more huh?” Atsumu answered sarcastically.</p><p>Hinata laughs when he looks at what Atsumu was searching, pointing at the images of the flowers. </p><p>“Don't worry about it too much Atsumu-san! Just let the person you love know about your feelings! It's hard to not like you.” The ginger puts his head on top of Atsumu as he laughs along with Bokuto.</p><p>He doesn't feel like laughing.</p><p>“It's Sakusa. I like Sakusa.”</p><p>Silence.</p><p>No one dares to speak a word.</p><p>Hinata and Bokuto get some pillows and blankets and they build a fort, Atsumu giving in and getting into it as if it was a fox entering its nest, followed by a bucket.</p><p>They spend the evening in silence. His throat hurts, and so does his chest at the confirmation that Sakusa might not like him and that he will die due to this.</p><p>He still doesn't want the surgery.<br/>If his love for Kiyoomi is the one that kills him then so be it. He had accepted the fate by now, and at least he wished to get remembered as someone who wasn’t a coward enough to let his feelings die.</p><p> </p><p>Step 3; he gives up.</p><p>Atsumu sees no reason to keep going anymore, hopelessly flirting with Sakusa while his lungs burnt and felt like they were slowly going smaller, fatigue being usual even in his talking.</p><p>Everyone notices, he isn't the setter he used to be.<br/>Hinata and Bokuto stop talking to Sakusa, taking care of the fake blonde instead while the raven hitter wonders what he did wrong.</p><p>He gets tired.</p><p>Sakusa is sick of waiting to get an answer. He has been patiently waiting for Atsumu to recover to hit his sets. Perfect sets that don't need any double-checking or analyzing, ones he can hit with ease.</p><p>From his perspective, the hazel eyes full of pride have turned into almost emotionless ones, a dark shade of brown taking over the shiny one.<br/>Flushed skin had turned into a pale fragile one.</p><p>Atsumu was not the same, and Sakusa noticed. </p><p>Sakusa noticed how he barely went out anymore. His calls with his brother had been less and less, getting colder and colder with him to the point where he heard Osamu sniff from the other line and an enraged Suna come on the phone to curse Atsumu's ear off.</p><p>So, Sakusa snaps.<br/>The ball that just got set falls to the floor, Atsumu letting out a wheeze as he was unable to properly set it to Sakusa, angering him and making the dark-eyed male drag the other by the hem of the shirt towards the locker room.</p><p>Teammates went to protest, asking what was wrong, Hinata and Bokuto trying their best to let him out. The coach denied and asked to go back to practicing. Everyone had to obey, the thought of the pair running through their minds.</p><p>“Are you fucking mad? It's killing you.” Atsumu is sitting on the bench, leaning against the wall for support while Sakusa walks from side to side as his tone screams anger. “You're fucking mental. It's killing you, yet you don't want to get rid of it.”</p><p>“It doesn't matter now.” Atsumu sighs out, a small cough and some pink petals falling from his mouth. “I give up. It's no use.”</p><p>“At least confess your fucking feelings idiot. That might either kill you for once or put you out of your misery.”</p><p>Atsumu is tired. Fatigued. Heavy breaths fill the room along with Sakusa's rapid steps.</p><p>“Omi-kun,” Atsumu calls him. Sakusa pays attention to him, stopping in his tracks. “Y'know… I love you.”</p><p>Freeze.</p><p>Both bodies freeze, Sakusa tries to process what he just said, hand turning into a fist in a rapid motion out of anger and shame.</p><p>“Miya. You. You shouldn't joke about-”</p><p>“I'm not. I love you.” Atsumu repeats. “Kiyoomi.”</p><p>A sharp pain. Sakusa tugs at his shirt.</p><p>“No, you don't. Stop that.”</p><p>Atsumu nods.</p><p>The raven feels like he's going to pass out. He is choking on something, his vision is blurry. Everything feels on fire and it all hurts.<br/>He coughs, yet it just continues hurting, his legs giving up on him and making him fall to the floor just to continue coughing his lungs out.</p><p>Atsumu panics. He picks him up, the body sweating as if it had a fever, and Sakusa is completely gone, seemingly in and out of consciousness as he murmured apologies and pleads and I love yous that barely came out as whispers just to search for relief.<br/>He runs as fast as his weak legs can do, opens the door, and calls for his coach, for his team, for everyone in the gym, and in no time both of them are on their way to the hospital, Atsumu running his hands through Sakusa, who keeps coughing up flowers and petals and gagging on them.</p><p>Once they're there, Atsumu runs once again and calls for help. Once Sakusa is being taken away and treated, fatigue settles in and he falls to the floor, calling even more attention. <br/>After days, the tiredness and actual feelings to rest kicks in, deciding it's a good time to take a nap while doctors rush him to his room.</p><p> </p><p>“How is Sakusa?”</p><p>His team is silent in the hospital room. He just woke up, his chest aches and so does his head, yet the memories of the rush into the hospital play over and over, all the things Sakusa said to him while being hurt.</p><p>“He's, well,” Atsumu gulps nervously. There are no flowers, no petals, there's nothing anymore, just the distant ache in his chest, “he has to be fine. Right? He got the surgery. There's no Hanahaki to worry about.”</p><p>The nurse asks everyone to leave, staying behind to talk to Atsumu. She sits on the bed and smiles at him.</p><p>“Sakusa Kiyoomi.” The setter's face lights up with hope, smiling widely as the nurse looks away, ashamed plus guilty. “He happens to be… He’s in critical condition. I'm so sorry.”</p><p> </p><p>“Kiyoomi.”</p><p>Atsumu tries to call, Sakusa laying on the bed and giving him nothing but his back.</p><p>He's mad, and Atsumu understands. It's all because of him, his fault.<br/>He ruined the raven's chances to just have an easy life without Hanahaki, which made all his time and money to get the surgery just go to waste over his stupidity.</p><p>“I'm sorry.”</p><p>The setter imagines himself in Sakusa's situation. He wouldn’t want to talk to him either, and he quietly wishes he just gave up and chose death as his fate instead of watching him suffer</p><p>The flowers were gone from his lungs at once, yet the ache of causing Kiyoomi to be in the bed in front of him made him whine and sighs out loud.</p><p>He leaves the room.</p><p>Maybe Sakusa doesn't want to hear from him anymore, and that's fine.</p><p> </p><p>The blonde bought some blue hydrangeas and took care of them for a while.<br/>Turns out they were the flowers he coughed up. Hydrangeas. He yawns as he waters them before going to sleep.</p><p>“Omi-Omi!” He yells when entering the hospital room. Sakusa's back is facing him again. “I bought flowers. For ya! I'm considerate. Give me a try?”</p><p>No answer.</p><p>He didn't expect one anyway.</p><p>“Either way, y'know, doctors say yer recovering quickly!” Atsumu begins. “The team is doing good, but I rather have ya with us.”</p><p>There's a hum from the body in bed, a bit shuffling as Sakusa pushes the cover-up and covering up more of his body.</p><p>“Yer cold?”</p><p>There's still no answer to tell him, yet he takes his jacket off and puts it over the hitter.</p><p>“I just washed it today. No worries. See ya tomorrow?”</p><p> </p><p>“Omi-kun, yer a germaphobe?”</p><p>Sakusa seems annoyed at the nickname. He barely knows the guy yet he's being all kinds of noisy and no matter how much Komori tries to keep him away from the curly-haired teen.</p><p>“Mysophobia. Yes,” he sighs out, “I'm a "germaphobe" if you call it that.”</p><p>“Knew it! Yer just weird.” Atsumu chuckles and walks away.</p><p>This guy is a jerk. Yet his sets are perfect. So is his dyed hair, and his smile, and his cologne too smells nice, just as if Atsumu personally went to take it from his grandpa before his passing. He's a perfectionist, just like him, except Sakusa has it worse. His mind wonders how much of a match they would be.</p><p>His chest starts hurting. He feels sick. Adrenaline runs through his veins when he coughs and runs away, panicking as his breaths turn wet and his world spins into despair.</p><p>Then, Sakusa wakes up, gasps and tugs Atsumu's jacket over his head.</p><p>The smell grounds him, familiar and clean.</p><p>His body aches and he buries his face on the jacket, muffling his sobs and hiding his face from the nurse in the room that looks over him and asks him if he's alright.</p><p>He is not alright. In fact, it was as if he caught the worst flu of all.</p><p> </p><p>Months have passed since then, Sakusa was back at his apartment and sleeping in his bed at once, staring at the window with a tired gaze.</p><p>Pink hydrangeas and bright spider lilies grow under the sunlight that began to light the room through the window, said light hitting the bed and fully waking up the one in bed.</p><p>Porcelain skin full of moles appears from under the blanket as he gets up and looks at the clock while another male pulls him and makes him fall on the bed, nuzzling his side and humming content. He looks back from his shoulder, taking the view of golden locks sprawled on the pillow and bronze rays covering perfect skin, making it seem ethereal, almost untouchable as if it was a god he used to learn about in high school.</p><p>“Atsumu.” Sakusa murmurs, smiling petting the setter's hair. “Not a morning person, I know, but let me go. I have an interview.”</p><p>“Don't wanna… Lose ya again. No surgeries, no nothin'.” He groans, voice filled with sleep. “Stay.” </p><p>Sakusa rolls his eyes away but gives in and cuddles closer to Atsumu, closing his eyes and softly humming songs under his breath, songs they heard on the radio during the nights the blonde stayed at the hospital watching over him, singing those same songs and talking a bit too much compared to the usual quietness of the place.</p><p>He gave him a chance. He forgot about the surgery, got rid of the ache of his body, and told Atsumu he was willing to try.</p><p>They won matches or lost them, went to celebrate or had a quiet day to forget about the losses, went on dates or commented on volleyball matches, ate each other with their eyes or held hands under tables, smiles under masks, and scoffs without them.</p><p>“So. Hanahaki, huh?”</p>
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